Thursday, December 18, 2008

Who the Hell Names Their Kid Adolf Hitler?!

Seems a couple in New Jersey named their kid Adolf Hitler. (And is upset that their local grocery store refused to put the little tyke's name on a birthday cake.)

Like, seriously?!

I mean, really?

Okay, I believe in free speech and all, but that's just way over the line.

Naming your child after one of the most heinous dictators of the 20th century is INSANE!

I mean, we're talking about a guy who waged warfare across Europe and Russia and killed six million Jews and countless other minorities, and this is the person after whom you name your child?!

Is this really the person you want your child to admire?* An impotent, failed artist from Austria** who somehow managed to rise to power in Germany and nearly devastate the world with his megalomaniac views and policies?

Frankly, I'd rather name a child Dick Cheney.


* Call me crazy, but normally when you name a child after someone, it's because you admire something about that person. What is there to admire about Hitler?!
** It pains me to point out he's from Austria, because I lived there and loved it. It's a beautiful country. Of course, I also met Austrians, while I lived there, who couldn't understand "all the fuss [we] Americans make about Hitler. He wasn't so bad. He gave us back our dignity and created jobs." (That's a direct quote from a Viennese frau I had lunch with one day.)

17 comments:

NG said...

They'd have been just as successful naming their kid "Please kick my ass and make me ashamed to tell people my name for the rest of my life."

Lucy said...

Great post. The idiocy of people is unexplainable. That poor child. I guess he can always sue them someday. I actually was looking in the phone book once in some city somewhere and was *shocked* that the name Hitler even still exists. Had it been my family name? I wouldn't use it.

Gilahi said...

Well, Hitler did give us the Volkswagen. Actually, now that I think of it, that's another strike against.

J.M. Tewkesbury said...

NG: Precisely!


Lucy: Just be glad Hitler didn't stick with his family's original last name: Schicklgruber. On the other hand, perhaps if that had been his last name, he wouldn't have become chancellor of Germany. I mean, who wants to shout, "Heil Schicklgruber"?!


Gilahi: And the Porsche. Don't forget the Porsche.

Cele said...

This same couple have a child named Aryan Nation Campbell. Thumbs up to RiteAid who refused to do the cake, and boos and hisses to the Walmart that did. Now I believe every child has a right to a birthday cake, but I hope this parents' campaign of hatred back fires on them. Sadly I imagine they are raising three little thems to hate with more gusto than they themselves do.

When I lived in Germany I became friends with a family whose father had been conscripted into the German army when the borders were closed at the start of WWII and he couldn't get back to Checkoslovakia. He said the best day of his life (to that point I suspect) was when he was captured by the British, who traded him to the Yanks and he was sent to Fort Hood's concentration camp for five years.

Jess said...

The part that infuriates me is that their other kids are named Aryan Nation and something after Heinrich Himmler, the evil orchestrator of the Holocaust, and yet their line to the media is that they aren't racist and they don't understand what all the fuss is about. Clearly, they ARE racist and they seem to be fine with that, so I don't understand why they don't just admit it. You don't name your kids after white supremacists if you're worried that people will think you're racist.

j.m. tewkesbury said...

Cele: Yeah, I noted that, too. I guess there's no accounting for stupidity. Or denial.


Jess: Hear! Hear! If the Campbells of New Jersey aren't racist then I'm a member of the Ku Klux Klan.

Herb of DC said...

How come the parents aren't being cited for child abuse? This story greatly angers me...

J.M. Tewkesbury said...

Herb: Probably because of a lovely little thing called "The First Amendment." Seriously, though? There should be rules about names, like they have in Germany, France, and Sweden.

Cele said...

They have rules about names in other countries? woah.

foundinidaho said...

Their kid will grow up and change his name to Barck Obama. And the other one will change his to Tiger Woods. Maybe Frederick Douglass. Or something along those lines. I pray this much is true.

j.m. tewkesbury said...

Cele: Yep. In Germany, they have a law that you cannot name your child Adolf Hitler or Osama bin Laden. (You also can't buy or own a copy of Hitler's Mein Kampf. In France, they have a list of names that are not permitted because they might result in teasing and bullying. Sweden is similar, I believe. Oh, and in Australia recently, a seven-year old sued to have her name changed from Talula Does the Hulu from Hawai'i because it was embarrassing for her and she was constantly teased. Her new name was not disclosed in the article. You can read about it here, here, and here. (Stupid ass parents.)


FII: One can only hope, because come junior high, those kids' names are going to become living hell.

j.m. tewkesbury said...

Cele: Whoops. Error in my last comment. Talula lives in New Zealand. Not Australia. Sorry 'bout that.

Katherine said...

So, how old do you have to be to legally change your name again? Because somebody needs to tell that kid and help him start a countdown.

J.M. Tewkesbury said...

Katherine: 18? I don't know. You're the Maven of Lawyerly Things. Perhaps you should ply him some animal crackers and start persuading him now to enlist the services of a good lawyer.

Maya said...

Hey, I like VW's! So, maybe that is the only good thing he pushed for. He was doing enough for the country that he managed to get many people behind him. But, some (like my grandmother) saw right though him.

I can't believe these people are so stupid as to name their kids these names. Even if they think it's a good thing in their little racist world, the kids are certainly going to get teased and more and suffer a lot of psychological damage. Maybe some names should be outlawed!

j.m. tewkesbury said...

Maya: Okay, I should confess, there is a VW Passat in my household and I LOVE it. Such a great ride! The only good thing that came out of Nazi Germany was that technology. Otherwise, what a disaster. As for stupid names, Adolf Hitler Campbell's parents should be smacked in the head with a shoe.