Ten Things I Don't Understand...

I've been keeping a list for a few weeks now of some random things I just don't understand. Thought I'd share.

1. Household garbage cans that hold more than a couple of days' worth of trash. Gross.

2. In hand with that, neighbors who set their garbage out in the common area and let it sit for a few hours or a couple of days rather than immediately walking it to the communal trash receptacle. Hello, neighbor? The dumpster is down the hall, through the lobby, down four stairs, and through the door on the left. What is that? Like 15 steps farther? Don't be so lazy.

3. People who are crazy makers. I'm talking about the Jekyll/Hyde types. One minute, pissed at you and biting your head off, then sweet as sugar and cozying up to be your best friend the next. That's not working for me so much anymore.

4. Defacing things. I don't get it. Okay, some graffiti is cool and looks like art, but just straight up tagging or writing your name and number on the bathroom wall or carving up a tree, so very uncool. It's right up there with littering for me. You litter, or deface something, and my respect for you drops about eight notches out of ten. Really. (As an alternative, why don't you get that someone you love a pair of these rather than leaving your public display of affection on the wall of a smelly bathroom in the middle of Nebraska or Italy?)

5. People who can't text, comment on Facebook, or spell out words completely. Especially if you're over the age of 35. (Frankly, there's no excuse at any age, but if you're a grown-up, you really should know better.) I'm tired of reading stuff like this: "Hope yur dad luvd yur pressie." Really? Is it so hard to spell correctly? Is the O on your keyboard not working? And what about the E? That's all of four extra letters and a dropped U. I'm even willing to overlook "pressie" for "present" if you'll simply spell "your" and "loved" correctly.

6. Not returning things in the same condition (or near same condition) you found them in. (Yeah, this one is very personal at the moment. $10,000 personal. Motherf*ckers. Y'all know who I'm talking about.)

7. Hand-in-hand with #6, people who don't have enough self-respect for themselves and/or respect for others to treat each other and things they have the way they would expect to be treated. Blatant disregard and disrespect are beyond my realm of comprehension.

8. 50 Shades of Grey. Nothing more to say about this one.

9. Planned obsolescence. Completely and utterly wasteful and wrong. I don't want a new fill-in-the-blank every 6, 9, 18 months or 2, 3, or 5 years. I like the one I have right now and I want it to keep working, thank you very much!

10. Hot waffles and cold syrup. Seriously do not understand this one. If I wanted cold waffles, I would order or make cold waffles. But I don't. I want hot waffles. Ergo, I also want hot syrup. Why is this so difficult?

Photo copyrights: Oscar the Grouch, The Children's Television Network/Sesame Street; tagged urinal, The Best Graffiti blog; tenant-trashed house, Janet M Kincaid; and waffle with melted butter, Unknown/MyConfinedSpace.com.