Friday, April 18, 2008

Fast & Testimony Picnic I

A few months ago, I wrote that this was my new favorite saying. That inspired my friend, Alice of Alice's Adventures Underground to comment, if she could find a way to incorporate the aforementioned quote into a talk for church, she would.

One thing led to another and before you could say "pass the funeral potatoes" at the church potluck, I'd passed around a cyber sign-up sheet where everyone chose what their role would be if we were to create a de facto ward/congregation where sayings like the previously aforementioned could be quoted. We ended up with an eclectic bunch of fabulous folk who wanted to be everything from program-hander-outers to colorful, crazy person, from Gospel Doctrine Reconstruction teacher to Critical Thinking Development advisor, from custodian of the Holy Damn Cat and habitually late attender to the Holy Goat and hall roamer. We even have a couple of people who have chosen to be Very Important Pew People and/or participants in the choir.

Finally, and faster than you can say, "I know the Gospel is true with every fiber of my being," the New Order was called to order and Aitch Emm in the Ewe Kay was officially declared bishop. (The decision about who would be bishop was purely unilateral. My blog. My call! Besides, it was Aitch who suggested to Alice, back in the first entry that started all of this, how she might edit the heretofore aforementioned quote into a talk, which then [d]evolved into comments about a personal device called a She-Wee. Apparently, said holy relic saved Aitch in a few dire situations in Poland last year. [One day, that story will no doubt acquire apocryphal meaning and significance and will be the foundation of many a faith promoting tale and rumor in our new little order.])

The bottom line is, we created the Tewkesbury Ward and decided that in lieu of Fast & Testimony meetings we would have Fast & Testimony picnics.

Only two rules apply: first, there has to be food and second, each person must contribute one sentence to the collective testimony. Extra points are awarded for creative testimony involving singing or costume change or delivered by 'charade' method.

Leave your sentence contribution to the collective testimony in the comments. For the latter three options, please post your contribution to your blog and leave a link to such in the comments. Also, in all cases, please be sure to tell us what you're bringing to the picnic.

Whoever leaves a comment first is the one who kicks off the picnic.

All those in favor, manifest it. Any opposed, by the same sign.

I'll kick it off here.

I'd like to stand on my feet...

(Oh, and Happy (Photo) Friday!)

Photo copyright: D.C. Confidential.

Fast & Testimony Picnic is a Tewkesbury Ward trademark.
All rights reserved.
Any resemblance to persons living or dead or caught up in translation, rapture, resurrection
or any other kind of explained-only-by-religion phenomenon is purely coincidental.


Anonymous said...

I'd like to remain sitting...or perhaps lazing on my back...and say that I don't Know anything. But I believe that friends and picnics are a good reason for life to be sweet. I do know that if it's too hot and humid, I'd rather have an indoor picnic.

I'm bringing a case of ice-cold prosecco and loads of those 6-for-$1.50-glass Ikea flutes so we can all toast, cheer and make merrymerrymerry.

And yes, because tomorrow we die.

- Di

NG said...

"I would feel very ungrateful if I let today go by without publicly expressing how grateful I am for picnics... and really food in general."

(oh, and I'm bringing fudgesicles)

Anonymous said...

I don't know what I can say without getting way too sappy about it, but something about how true friends make life worth living. Ish.

And my rhubarb is coming up, so I think I'll bring that fabulous rhubarb-ginger tart, with vanilla ice cream.

Cele said...

I would like to say, "Thank you for this spread before us, for we are blessed with good friends and growing butts, and no one gives a damn beyond communing. Yada, yada, yada. Blah, blah, blah."

I'm bringing pistachio salad

Wicked H said...

As Choir Director it falls upon me to make sure we have many and assorted libations.

Can I hear an AMEN? Any key will suffice.....

Anonymous said...

Webster's Dictionary defines the word "Whoa Nelly Furtado" as:

- an improvement on "Whoa Nelly," as in:

"Whoa, Nelly -- where do you think you're going with that chocolate fondu? Park it right here!"

I'm bringing a Grande Mocha Frappacino Light, and nobody touches it -- NObody!

- In the Name of Phoebe, Amen

ME said...

"I would also be ungrateful if I didn't loll before you today and tell you how blessed we are to be in the Tewekesbury Ward. I know this ward is true and the picnics and camaraderie are better here than in any other ward I've been in."

I'm bringing a lentil, roasted red pepper and feta salad with lemon mint dressing and Granny's potato salad dressed up with spicy mustard and dill.

LG said...

I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that this picnic is true, and that the drinking is truly inspired.

I promised myself I wouldn't do this, but - *sniff* - I want to thank all those who brought adult beverages, because you've made my calling (Happy Hour Coordinator) truly rewarding.

Oh, and I'm bringing additional beverages and Cool Ranch Doritos.

Adriana Velez said...

Can I stumble in late with a pitcher of Pimm's?

Phoenix Touch said...

As your.... (ummmm.... I have forgotten my calling... Could that be because I am, apparently, habitually late and sick for all things Tewkesbury-Ward related? I think it was something like Deliverance Syndicate Leader??? Yeah! That's it.)

As your Deliverance Syndicate Leader, I would like to bare my testimony of the truthfulness of the principals taught here in the Tewkesbury Ward. And the picnics are the best ever! I know this with every fiber of my being.

Oh. And I am bringing funeral potatoes! tee hee hee